Place in the World

Life is a constant stumble and fumble
of navigating through the world
looking for your place
for where you are supposed to be
as if the universe designed a single little space where only you can fit.
But the you of yesterday is not the you of tomorrow.
Does the universe know this?
Does it change and adapt
as you change and grow,
change and regress?
Perhaps it creates numerous little spaces for you to occupy;
for when you find yourself alone and free
or together and comfortable.
Perhaps your mistakes and mishaps
reshape your little niche,
moves it from place to place.
So you struggle and fumble some more,
forever searching.
But maybe the universe mocks us all
and we never need truly search,
for we are always where we should be
in the time and place.
It seems we are destined to a fate of free will and decision
and it is only a matter or embracing yet not attempting
to solve this puzzle of a life
which allows our unknown place to reveal itself.


written: March 1st, on my blackberry, finished in the Plaza Mayor, Salamanca, Spain

An Expensive Cocktail

My heart is heavy.

When I breathe in, there is something pushing back against me, as if it is trying to prevent me from taking another unsavoury, life giving breath.

When I breathe out, it feels like my whole body tries to leave too, weighing me down as it tries to escape.

My limbs grow heavy, my eyes they close, my will to do anything vanishes. It is as if all my burdens suddenly decide to appear all at once, in a calm, overwhelming feeling where a sweet, sorted confusion is all that remains.

Eventually I give in and sink to the ground or whatever is underneath me, be it a chair or a bed. I sink and would keep sinking were it not for the Earth beneath my feet. On my tongue I taste acid indifference but mixed with two shots of syrupy sadness and a dash of loneliness. A strange combination but one that is all too familiar.

I'm as far into this cocktail as my physical body will take me but my mind keeps drinking away. And eventually I give in and order me another glass. I pay with my heart - heavy, not worth a lot, but just enough to overdose.

That Time We Went to Italy (Part 1) ... Rome

I'm the worst at writing travel blogs. I was going through some of my older ones thinking, damn I wrote a lot. The daunting prospect of writing a post or two or three about our five days travelling around Italy is probably why I put it off for over a month. But here we go! If you have any questions, feel free to write a comment :)


Day 1 - April 18th 

We started our five day voyage across the Boot, in Roma. (Cue the Lizzie McGuire Movie references). I heard some interesting things about Rome beforehand but the city was not at all what I expected. Well, actually I'm not sure what I expected but it certainly wasn't that. The beginning part of the trip was filled with a bit of transportation woes, starting back in Madrid but following us to Rome. The buses from Rome's Ciampino Airport to the city centre are a complete travesty and a scam - despite only costing 4 euros. It's not even worth it. After about an hour of waiting for the bus we gave up and got a taxi.

After checking in to our hostel (which was actually a guesthouse) we had a fabulous first Italian meal of gnocci served by a fabulous Italian waitress. From there we walked to Palentine Hill, which "is the centremost of the Seven Hills of Rome and one of the most ancient parts of the city," Wikipedia says.  Amazing is the best word that is coming to mind right now. The bright sun and really warm weather just enhanced the beauty of this ancient site, filled with stairs and gardens and ruins of once great homes, palaces and temples. In Ancient Roman mythology, these grounds hold the cave where the infant boys Romulus and Remus were found by the she-wolf that kept them alive before they were later raised by a human couple. It is from the story of these two boys and the eventually victory of Romulus over Remus, that Rome gets its name.



Gnocci (yummmm)



Palentine Hill

From there we went to the Forums (you can just walk straight to them - they are on the same grounds) and looked in amazement at the Roman Forum, the plaza that was once the centre of the entire Roman Empire.



The Roman Forum

The last was the famous Flavian Amphitheatre, a.k.a. the Colosseum, which I always have such a difficult time spelling. When I was in grade 9, I went to France and Switzerland with my high school and one of the first towns in France we visited was Nîmes. There, there is an amphitheatre called the Arena de Nîmes. To me the Colosseum was just a bigger version of that. It was still amazing though being in the theatre where those infamous gladiator fights were held. When you're standing inside, you can see down into what would have been a basement hidden underneath the arena floor. From the ruins it is easy to imagine cages where animals and slaves were kept, the hecticness that must have gone on below ground while emperors and subjects cheered on the bloody battles playing out above.




Inside the Colosseum

Day 2 - April 19th

Day number due started off late because we had to move from our first hostel to another, due to some random booking we did. The issue was that we could not find this hostel for the longest time. It took about 2 hours longer than we had originally planned, but once we found it we headed out to a whole new country: The Vatican City.

CPGrey has a fantastic video explaining all about Vatican City and how it is possible for such a tiny country to exist within another country, let alone within a city. Just so you know, there are no customs or passport control or anything of the like to enter. You just walk past a wall and say "Hey! I'm in Vatican City!" Then you turn around and walk a few more steps and say, "Hey! I'm back in Rome/Italy!". Then you turn around and do it all over again.

We toured the inside of the absolutely stunning St Peter's Basilica and stood in awe of the marble and gold and pure artistry that surrounded us. The extravagance was astounding and a tad off putting but brilliant nonetheless. Naturally, like the tourists we are, we went to the world's smallest postal service and send off some (expensive!) postcards, just for the heck of it.




The Basilica - we think the chairs are for a mass

The ceiling in St. Peter's

After pretending to escape from the tiny country, we hopped on the metro and made our way to the

trying to escape

to the Piazza del Popolo where there is the church of Santa Maria del Popolo and a giant obelisk in the plaza. We fell prey to the tourist trap of buying roses from those sketch guys who persistently try to sell you things and ended up taking cheesy pictures with them (the roses, not the sketch guys). We then went too the fanciest McDonald's EVER and watched the sun set on the Spanish Steps. The rest of the evening/ night was spent walking from one monument to the next, enjoying the outdoor night life. We saw the Fountain of Neptune in the Piazza Navona, the Pantheon, ate some gelato and ended the night at the Trevi Fountain. I reminisced of days from my youth where I watched the Lizzie McGuire movie somewhat religiously and in tribute, I did a very inaccurate recreation of the film by singing (horribly) "What Dreams are Made Of" while Em filmed it. Some people nearby clapped and cheered me on. It was thoroughly embarrassing but had to be done. The only bad thing was that I never got mistaken for an Italian pop star, met a cute singer named Pablo or got handed a giant wheel of cheese. But what can you do?



Piazza del Popolo

The Fancy Schmancy McDo's

The Spanish Steps

Fountain of Neptune

The Pantheon

Em and Vi with gelato and crepes

The 3 coins I tossed into the fountain

The Trevi Fountain

Italy Part 2 soon!

The Call

Artwork: Julia Yellow (source)

I can hear it: in the night, at lunch, as I walk down the street. It is loud and is getting louder every day, shouting my name and urging me to come. It accompanies me where ever I go. Sometimes it's a ringing whisper in the back of my head; other times it's a horrible, jarring, screeching tone.

It wasn't always this loud. It used to be a dim voice that I would notice every now and then; an accompanying soundtrack when I heard a certain song or watched a certain show. But now it has got a hold of my heart strings and the constant vibrations cause pain and tears. It messes with my mind and plays with my feelings. But there's no way I can stop the call until I go back to the source and hang up the phone.

DIY Round-up: Threaded Belts + Bangles and Studded Shoes

I've wanted to write a post about some DIYs I've been working on for a while and I FINALLY have gotten around to it.

About 2 weeks ago one of my favourite DIY/Fashion YouTubers Evalina Barry posted a really easy DIY recreating embroidery threaded belts from J. Crew that normally cost about 40 dollars. Her DIY cost no more than 4 and looked just as good. You can watch her video here: DIY JCrew Threaded Belts.

Here is what I came up with, using an old belt from my closet.

I liked the look so much I revamped a few bangles I just bought as well. I loved the gold bangles originally, but I knew I would never wear them because the sound of metal banging on metal annoys the heck out of me, which is probably why I only own beaded bangles - because they are quieter.

I decided on red and white in a sudden burst of patriotism (or perhaps homesickness?).

Side note: I stored my embroidery thread using Studs and Pearls easy yet brilliant cardboard thread spool that I made out of a cereal box. You can find her tutorial and blog post here. Mine aren't as cute though. 

The last DIY is a bit strange, albeit, but in my opinion cool nonetheless. Awhile ago I bought some shoes online and I liked them a lot. Then they came in the mail and I noticed the platform was a lot higher than it looked online. I should have checked the platform height in the details but it was one of those "free shipping, on sale, impulse buy" sorta things. Either way, the shoes are confortable to walk in but the uniformity of the tan colour and the tall height have deterred me from wearing them. So I decided to give them a mini makeover that may or may not be complete.

they're sooo high!

I have been in love with studded shoes for a while and a few months back I saw some posts here and here for DIY versions of some Jeffery Campbell studded shoes. It's realllllly simple: find some wedges or platform, put some glue on it and stick a bunch of thumbtacks in. Easy-peasy.

I still haven't completely decided if I want to cover the whole platform or not but I like the basic division of colour so far. I would also prefer bronze thumbtacks but I couldn't find any. When I go back home, I might do the whole base in bronze.

So that's how I've been keeping myself busy when avoiding school stuff. I'm also working on turning a dress into a skirt and whatever other things I point my scissors at and cut.

What do you think: should I cover the whole heel?

Till next time! :)

The Week: Birthday Cake

It's MAY!!! I know, I know, I'm about 12 days late for this springtime celebration but still, it's generally one of my favourite months. Not just because it's my birthday month but because it's a fresh start: things are blooming, the weather is warmer, if I was in uni back in Canada, school would be over, and here only a month and a half-ish until I go back home :)

For my 21st birthday on Tuesday (true thoughts on that here), I spent the day in 8 glorious hours of class, with a nice nap in between. That evening my flatmates "surprised" me by putting candles on the cheesecake Vi made (18 to be precise - keeps me youthful) and presented me with the CUTEST strawberry purse, a bottle of nail polish and a gorgeous ring I had my eye on. It was a lovely evening.

People have been telling me I need to party it up while in Spain for my birthday, but honestly, birthday's are fairly trivial to me. Not other people's just my own. I have been trying for the past week to remember what I did last year but clearly it wasn't anything important because I can't remember for the life of me!

Wednesday, as we left our last class of the day (Portuguese), Vi and I were greeted with this scene:

We figure it was a warm up for the theatre production that was about to start down the street, but most people were just standing watching these homeless mimes (?) jump up and down in succession. Seems like it would have been an interesting play.

Friday I went for coffee with some girls from my geography class and we chatted and had a good time and they even paid for my (belated birthday) cake! ♥ That evening we had dinner at my place with one of our friends who unfortunately lost her voice and had to write on a notepad. One of Em's friends came by later as well and we spent the rest of the night watching really funny YouTube videos. It's what you do when you don't feel like going out. Fun times! (I ♥♥♥ YouTube).

The rest of this week shall be thoroughly unexciting as I struggle to do two major projects that completely suck and are due the same day. Ever try reading 200 pages of Jesuit recount of the conquest of Chile written in Spanish from the 1500s, where the pages are badly scanned copies of the 500 year old original? Don't ever try it. Sigh...

Happy Sunday :)

¿Porque?

Tengo una pregunta.
¿Porque?
¿Porque me quieres? ¿Porque me ames?
No sé porque.
Y es la pregunta de mi vida,
pero la respuesta que no quiero.





Copyright Sarrah Coward 2013. All rights reserved.

21

21. Wow. Twenty freaking one. Now I can drink legally drink in America. Yay!?! (But let's be honest, I only go to the States to shop.)

There isn't the much to turning this age, no real advantages to being 21. It is so much closer to 22, which let's face it, sounds for some reason a lot older. 21 means I am an adult (well, technically that was 20, but this is just another year of re-enforcing that idea). According to Yahoo Answers, it means that I should be able to make rational and mature decisions; childish thinking should be behind me and my life goals and plans ahead of me.

If this were Christmas and I were Scrooge, I would say "Bah Humbug!" to that. Rational and mature decisions? Last week I was seriously considering dropping out of uni for a bit because I'm fed up with it, while at the same time I was mourning of the sad dis-figuration of my beloved stuffed hedgehog, Hedgey. I can barely decide what I want for dinner most days, let alone what to do this summer, after graduation or for the rest of my life.

Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful that I have made it to another year and that I get to spend it in Spain with some awesome people and 8 hours of class. But sometimes I feel like that Rizzle Kicks song, When I Was A Youngster:

Back when I was younger,
I wanted to be everything on the planet,
Now that I am older,
It seems the ambition has vanished

Yup. Pretty much sums me up at the start of my 21st year on this planet. Confused, without ambition, lost, older.

Happy Birthday to me.

Dublin Part #2

Here's Part #1: Oh So Sunny Ireland

The last few days in Dublin were chilled and relaxed days. Saturday was our designated shopping day (the BEST sort of designation.) We went to some vintage stores in Temple Bar (including the great FanciSchmancy Vintage who was having an awesome sale). We also went to an Oxfam Charity Shop, Top Shop, Top Man, Penny's, A-Wear, TJ Maxx, New Look and a cool indoor flea market. The usual (if I happened to live in Ireland). My most expensive purchase? These black creepers. Em and Vi hate them but I love them. Next you shall see me wearing heavy black eyeliner and making random references to unknown indie bands.

That night we went on a pub crawl with the same group we did the walking tour with on Thursday. It was kinda meh. You pay a standard fee but if you want anything besides the one shot per bar, you have to pay again. And Dublin's a lot more expensive then Salamanca (but then again most places are). Salamanca has spoiled us. We didn't stay till the end but we had a good enough time while we were there.There was a Brazilian girl who was the life of the group and some really nice Swiss girls (the German part). I also talked a bunch with a German guy who spent 9 months in army, back when it was obligatory, and who is now a professor of computer science somewhere in the middle of Germany. After some late night fries at the fast food joint that is Eddie Rocket's, we headed back to the hostal.

Sunday was the day we intended to go to Belfast, but being tourist fails, we never really looked up how to get there. So we spent another day in Dublin with no real idea of what to do. We also forgot to look at suggestions Vi gave us before we left. We settled on going to the Archeological museum to see the famous bog bodies, which were creepy, leathery and completely fascinating. We left the museum to go to a cinema to watch "The Host" but lo and behold, the time the internet gave us was 30 mins later than the actual show time. Thus we had to wait two hours for the next one. Naturally, we went shopping again - our excuse is that the theatre was five minutes away from three different malls.  When we were finally able to see the film, we saw that whole back row was filled with those rowdy obnoxious teenagers, you know, the bunch that talk too loudy and storm out noisely in the middle of the film. Yea, those ones. But the film itself was actually pretty good. You'd never guess it was the twilight lady who wrote the book it is based on.

a bog body

really cool mural somewhere

failing at thosse machine games while waiting for the movie to start.
(Peppa Pig, you are too clever. And I want that 20 euros you're holding)

After that we just had another chill, unexciting night as we headed, once more, to bed early because a long trip back to Salamanca was upon us the next day.

(Cue the cliché ending:) And that was Dublin/Ireland! A beautiful, awesome couontry with fantastic people that I one day hope to visit again. :)

Timmy's!

The National Library (I'm pretty sure)

The TV Survey

Bryarly just posted posted a movie survey she did on her blog (here!), and I thought I might take a crack at it too - except I altered it slightly so it would be about tv shows rather than movies, since I watch more television than films. 

Sophia from The Golden Girls

Your favourite T.V. show: at the moment, Veronica Mars, The Mindy Project, Game of Thrones

The last TV. show you watched: Veronica Mars seaon 2, episode 7

Your favourite action/adventure show: Hawaii Five-O (a guilty pleasure)

Your favourite drama: Does Downtown Abbey count?

Your favourite crime show: Body of Proof, NCIS

Your favourite soap opera: The Young and the Restless

Your favourite comedy: The Mindy Project, New Girl, The IT Crowd

Your favourite drama: Does Downtown Abbey count? Also the Good Wife (which I need to catch up on)

A T.V. show that makes you happy: The Golden Girls, Mooneboy

A T.V. show that you practically know the whole script of: any Kim Possible episode

Your favourite T.V. show from your childhood: Kim Possible, Lizzie McGuire, Fillmore, Dave the Barbarian, the Weekenders

Your favourite animated show: Phineas and Ferb, The Legend of Kora, Original Pokemon

A T.V show that you used to hate but now you love: Big Brother

Your favourite quote from any T.V. show: "Picture it..Sicily." - Sophia in the Golden Girls, anything Kelly from Misfits said

Your favourite made-for-TV movie: All the Good Witch movies and Serenity (was it made for T.V.?)

The best show you saw during the last year: Game of Thrones, Suits, A Touch of Cloth

A TV show that disappointed you the most: Oncec Upon A Time - I couldn't get through season 2

Your favourite television actor(s): Yannick Boisson (Murdoch on Murdoh Mysteries)

Your favourite television actress(es): Cote de Pable (Ziva on NCIS), Betty White (Rose on the Golden Girls)

Your favourite character from any show: Sophia Petrillo (The Golden Girls), Peter Bishop (Fringe), Lucy Liu's character on Ally McBeal, McGee (NCIS), Simon (Misfits)

Your favourite Canadian show: Republic of Doyle, Life with Derek, Murdoch Mysteries

Favourite Talk show: Ellen...is she a talk show?

Show you wish wasn't cancelled: GCB! It was so funny and the acting was fantastic! and Endgame and 18 to Life as well.

Favourite British shows: Misfits, Sherlock, Game of Thrones, Luther, Torchwood (seasons 1-3), The IT Crowd, Poirot, Agatha Chrisitie's Miss Marple

Favourtie Sci-Fi Show: Star Trek: TNG/Voyager/DS9, Fringe, Misfits (if it counts), Doctor Who (preferably seasons 1-4), Firefly

A show that is a guilty pleasure: Love It or List It, How It's Made, Walker Texas Ranger dubbed over in Spanish

TV Show with the best soundtrack: Veronica Mars, Glee (seasons 1-2)

Shows you'd like to watch: Battlestar Galactica, Roswell, Gilmore Girls

Sunny Ireland! - Dublin and West Ireland (Part #1)

Sun + sun + sun + a bit of clouds/sun + a threat of rain (on the very last day) can basically sum up the weather we had when Em and I spent 6-ish days in Ireland two weeks ago (April 3rd to 8th). It was the tail end of out lovely 10 day Easter Break and we were glad to go and get away from our lives of Chinese food and the television fantastic-ness that is Suits.

Let me first just state that Em and I are apparently horrible tourists, never doing enough research for a place before we go. We just tend to show up and be like "hit me!". Although this time we were a tad bit more prepared with the Trip Advisor Iphone app to guide us someways.

We stayed in the hostel Sky Backpackers - The Liffey, which was nice enough, and the location if great, right next to O'Donnell St which has a bunch of restaurants and stores, it's 10 minutes from two malls, some movie theatres, Temple Bar and Trinity - basically walking distance to most major Dublin attractions. The downside? The frustratingly squeaky floors and and the giant sun roof (is that what you call a giant window in a ceiling?). I slept on the top bunk and between 7:42 and 7:45 every morning I was awake because there was so much sun.

Sinead O'Connor in the hostel

We didn't do much the first night we arrived in the city. When we got off the shuttle from the airport, we were right outside the movie theatre where Tom Cruise was for the Dublin premiere of his new movie Oblivion. Unfortunately we missed him by about 3 hours, what a shame.

The next morning we started with a "free" walking tour (you know I love those things), and it was good. We actually ended up seeing most of the places we had wanted to - places like Trinity College, Dublin Castle, Christ Church Cathedral, Temple Bar, the Dublin usual. The Dublinia Gardens and another location that slips my mind were unfortunately closed when we went. From our tour guide we heard about a tour to Galway and the Cliffs of Moher in West Ireland the next morning so we bought tickets for that.

We spent the rest of the afternoon with some awesome Brazilians who are studying in Italy. Let it be said that Brazilians are great fun people and I vow to one day visit that country!

We went to the Natural History Museum where we saw some dead hedgehogs and creepy rabbits, St. Stephen's Green Shopping Centre, St. Patrick's Cathedral, that park where the Oscar Wilde statue is, and we watched the sun start to set over the lake in St Stephen's Green the Park. It was so beautiful and people were lounging about, soaking up this rare fabled Irish sun while watching swans try to mate.

St. Patrick's Cathedral

 
We went to bed early because we had to be up before the crack of dawn to get on a bus to head out west. The tour group we were with put us on an express commuter coach to the city of Galway and there we were picked u by our tour bus complete with authentic Irish tour guide who drove us to our destinations.

The first stop was the Connelly Family Farm where we gotto see a traditional working Irish family farm, climb the rocky "mountains", see the sea, and breathe in the fresh air on a clear sunny day. We ended the farm portion as all things should be ended, with cake. Award winning ckesto be precise. I had the peach and white chocolate cheesecake and it was  delicous and scrumptious and tasty and all things good in the world.

Em, Me and a girl named Jen on the "mountain". Canadians unite!

From there we drove through some small towns and villages, seeing ruins of castles and churches, farms and hills. Gorgeous. We went up a really windy hill, aptly named Corkscrew Hill. I found it marvelously windy, but it did not agree with Em at all. Most of the bus ride didn't.

Eventually we reached the stunning Cliffs of Moher. Our bus driver kept telling us how fortunate we ere to have clear skies for the farm and no rain or fog for the cliffs.

The Cliffs of Moher

a castle

After almost two hours there we made our way to the town of Doolin to have lunch. I had a seafood chowder, because, well, we were by the sea and I love chowder.

We headed back to Galway, traveling along the coast, looking at the Arran Islands on the other side of the bay and pausing to see some castle ruins. The whole time I thought the bus driver was saying the "Iron Islands", à la Game of Thrones.


In Galway we said goodbye to our great tour guide/bus driver and had an hour and a half free to explore the centre before we took a bus back  to Dublin. And by explore I mean do souvenir shopping (postcards, pins, magnets, the works). We then sat in square admiring flags and people watching, waiting to head back.

That's the end of Part #1, Part #2 soon!

The Merger

It's been a long time. Too long. But I  write to today of exciting news!!! (Well at least exciting news to me.) I combined my two blogs!!!!! (Yay??) Yes, yay. It is something I've been wanting to do for a while now and I finally got around to doing it.

The Old One:

My previous blog was called I Saw A Turtle On A Fence, and I kept it up for about a year and a half, ending it in February of last year. It was a great platform for me to express my thoughts and ideas of the moment as well as challenge myself with things like the 12 Days of DIY and the 50 Book Challenge. I felt a lot freer there than I do with this blog, so I decided to merge them. Since I never deleted Turtles, twas simple, exporting the old blog and importing it into the new one.

Changes:

Naturally, there will be some changes. Most notably the layout. The old Dynamic theme worked well with all the posts I've written since being in Salamanca, since they (almost), all have pictures. But on Turtles, there tended not to be as many photos. So I tried to pick something that was suitable for both. I'm still tinkering around with it so it be pink one day and green the next. Bare with me :)

Secondly, I think I'm going to start posting more often; not only things about my travels, but whatever I feel like be it culture, music, youtube, politics, fasion, DIYs or just my general opinion on a subject. Sounds good?

On another note, about two weeks ago I went to Ireland with Em and tonight Vi + us are heading to the airport to fly off to Italy tomorrow morning! I'm looking forward to it! I will write a post or two about Ireland and post them in the up coming days. Have a good Wednesday!

- Sarrah ♥